You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
