dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
So. Much. Porn.
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