i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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