drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
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