Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize