I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Randomize