Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Randomize
