Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Randomize
