Everything about him screamed your future.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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