Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
