I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize
