did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize