She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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