worst night to have a conscience
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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