I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
