pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
