paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
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