They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
