Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
