Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
You can't just leave with hair like that
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
