But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
