he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I lost the right to judge tonight
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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