Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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