with your own penis?
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize
