Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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