u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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