i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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