Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Randomize