Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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