But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
