it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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