we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
