these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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