Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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