we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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