covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
