so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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