At least make sure they are 18
Why
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize