i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
