nut hugger
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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