Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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