Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Another day, another engagement, another cat
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Randomize
