so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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