Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I need a beard to bite.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
