Only a mothe r could love this liver
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
