she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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