Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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