So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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