God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
pray to the hookup gods
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
