awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
