What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
just found out that she named her cat after me.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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