my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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