Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
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