I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
